Spam comments I have known, loved, and been confused by

Never underestimate the enjoyment you can get from occasionally reading your spam comments. I know – we’re all pretty busy, and it’s hard enough to find the energy to check to see if a real comment was mistakenly imprisoned in spam jail.

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As some of our friends have demonstrated in the past, however, these comments can provide a needed chuckle. The extra effort is sometimes worth it.

There was once an extended time period during which a spammer (or two) kept leaving me spam comments in the form of Harry Potter quotes. For example:

“I thought there was a Ministry of Magic?” asked Vernon Dursley abruptly.”

I was so charmed that I almost approved all of those comments. Almost.

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In any event, I miss them now. Come back, literary spammers!

I guess I’ll have to make do with this spam instead…

The Flatterers

As I website possessor I believe the content material here is rattling great , appreciate it for your hard work. You should keep it up forever! Best of luck.

I want that on my business cards: “Pup Fan, Website Possessor.”

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It is tough to acquire knowledgeable folks on this topic, but you sound like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks

I’ve always found it difficult to acquire folks in general. Where shall I keep them all even if I manage to acquire them?

Hi there, just became alert to your blog through Google, and found that it’s really informative. I’m going to watch out for brussels. I will be grateful if you continue this in future.

I need some clarification here. Should I be watching out for Brussels sprouts, the entire city of Brussels, or the Muscle from Brussels? I don’t know what to be afraid of… or to protect, depending on what you mean by “watch out for.” I’m pretty sure that Jean-Claude Van Damme can take care of himself though.

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This actually answered my downside, thanks!

You’re welcome.

The Backhanded Compliment

I have not checked in here for some time since I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are good quality so I guess I will add you back to my daily bloglist. You deserve it my friend.

Gee, thanks.

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The One Who Doesn’t Observe Boundaries

F*ckin’ tremendous issues here. I am very happy to look your article. Thanks so much and i’m having a look ahead to touch you. Will you kindly drop me a mail?

Stop. Stop right there. Do not pass go. Do not look ahead to touch me, whatever the hell that means. (Thank you, however, for censoring your own comment with that well-placed asterisk.)

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The Long-Lost Relative

Hi my family member! I wish to say that this post is amazing, good written and come with almost all significant infos. I would like to peer more posts like this ….

Uncle Jimbob, is that you?

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Marty McFly

Hey there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? There’s a lot of folks that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Cheers

Dude, if your time machine will take you back to 2006, feel free to share my blog with whoever you meet there. While you’re at it, here’s a hard copy for you to take back to the late ’80s/early ’90s. Considering that’s the era I draw so many references from, they’ll probably get a kick out of it. They may also think you are some sort of evil wizard, but I take no responsibility for any injuries you might then sustain as a result of time travel. You opened that door, bro.

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The Purveyors of Wisdom

Internet is written with the capital letter in a sentence, by the way. And hundredths are written not with a point but with a comma. This is according to the standard. And actually everything is very good..!

I know I’m supposed to believe everything I read on the Internet, but your second point (about points) has me feeling a bit skeptical.

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Yeah !… life is like riding a bicycle. You will not fall unless you stop pedaling!!…

You should write a self-help book. That’s deep.

Girls have developed unusual ideas for making tools since the beginning of time.

Cool, cool. I mean, who run the world, am I right?

Don’t forget: The best toothbrush for you is the one you’ll actually use.

I’ll never forget.

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I Don’t Even Know How to Classify These

I’ve not identified what I desired

I don’t think I can help you with that.

louis vuitton if you’re not a leather smelling professional

I’m not.

Keep adding their torpedo until unquestionably the sting is not too severe on the other hand to slight. fact this is really a really wrong view.

You lost me. What?

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You’re Not Even Trying Anymore

Ahaa, its {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious} {discussion|conversation|dialogue} {regarding|concerning|about|on the topic of} this {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} {here|at this place} at this {blog|weblog|webpage|website|web site}, I have read all that, so {now|at this time} me also commenting {here|at this place}.

If this comment had been on my Wag Libs post, I might have approved it to reward the spammer for such targeted work. Alas, that was not the case. So close, but yet so far.

In closing, if you’re a spammer, here’s a little something to keep in mind when you’re formatting your insightful comments on my blog posts.

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So, how about you? Get any good spam lately?

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28 thoughts on “Spam comments I have known, loved, and been confused by

  1. You are a dedicated blogger. I can’t go through more than one or two pages of spam looking for legitimate comments before I lose it.

    Here’s a recent favorite: “The foregoing means that ones body and thought are free of diseases and fearfulness. These methods are also beneficial for that respiratory system.”

    But I’m jealous of the Harry Potter spam. Mine’s not nearly so literary.
    Pamela recently posted..Take Care of Yourself – Good for the Dog; Good for You

  2. I love the Harry Potter spam. I went through my spam comments and took all of them out and put them in a draft for a future post. Some of the comments are actually quite amusing. Since I shut off my askimet to backup my blog and reinstalled it, the majority of my comments are coming through in Chinese (I think). There’s rarely any good ones anymore.

    My favorite had to be the one where they said it actually might be a good blog post if I wasn’t so busy whining. Truthfully, I was whining that day and I came thatclose to approving the comment. But I was afraid once I approved it they might be able to get more comments through.

    Then there was the time I wrote a story that had the word “bush’ in it, I can’t begin to tell you the comments I received on that one. I eventually had to make it private, I couldn’t even read through them.
    Jodi recently posted..Bon Jodi

  3. I try to keep up with my spam comments because some legitimate comments get zapped on occasion, but… it’s tough to stay on top of it! I glanced at the first page today and here’s one of my personal faves, “Hi colleagues, nice post and good arguments commented here, I am really enjoying by these.” Maybe I’m not internet savvy, but I’m confused about what they’re trying to accomplish? Just spreading links around? Does that tactic actually work for anyone?
    Maggie recently posted..Giveaway: Orijen treats from Chewy.com

  4. For some reason, when you share them, I laugh. When I wade through my own, I am not nearly so entertained! Yours must be better than mine. I also go through them since occasionally a real one gets trapped in there.
    I agree with Maggie….do they really accomplish anything with this stuff? Is anyone fooled by it?
    Jan K recently posted..Black & White Sunday – Hidey Hole

  5. O thanks for the laugh, my spam comments are no where near as funny! Just found your blog and I am already hooked!

    (does that sound very spammy? *concerned ears?!)

  6. I enjoy reading my spam too. I love all the flattery! I love reading it almost as much as I love reading the weird searches that bring folks to my blog (“dog drinking tequila” anyone?).

    Excellent post. I have been looking for information on this topic on the internet and I have found your blog and this has helped me an applicable amount. I will add it to my reader as you are excellent on this topic. Please also visit my website…
    Jackie Bouchard recently posted..Monday Mischief: Hold On To Your Pups, People!

  7. Since I’m just starting out I haven’t received any spam yet. Perhaps I’ll feel accomplished when I do!
    Makes me think about what I’ve said in comments and wonder if I sounded like a spammer when I write a comment at midnight. hmmm…
    That is such a great picture of your [dog/child/house/car] keep up the good work!
    Julie recently posted..The Siren Cry of a Schnauzer Puppy at Night

  8. Wow, you are too funny! It’s been a compliment that I finally am starting to receive regular spam on my blog…took awhile for that to happen. For the first few months I thought, why am I paying a monthly fee for Askimet when there isn’t even any spam to block? I agree that a lot of mine is Chinese like others here. I just deleted my spam folder, so don’t even have any examples right now. Keep up the good work and love all your video shots!
    sassmuffins recently posted..Fireworks 2013!

  9. I don’t get too much spam, but you can certainly tell that it is written by someone for whom English is NOT a first language 🙂

    I usually see one particular post getting hammered with spam, so then I turn off comments for that one post. The spam goes away for a while and then targets another post. I don’t require any approval or Captcha to leave a comment, so occasionally the spam-bots do win.
    Taryn recently posted..The Silly Way My Mind Works….

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