The posts at Something Wagging This Way Comes never fail to get me thinking. This recent post is no exception: 7 Books I Wish Dog Trainers Would Write. (Head on over and check it out… I’ll wait here.) I hope the one about teaching your dog to stop shedding gets written. If I could, I’d reserve a copy now.
Since Pamela’s got the dog training books covered, I thought I’d turn my eye to another segment of the market – books about dog behavior. I’m sure we all have a few mysteries in need of solving (and after all, imitation is supposed to be the sincerest form of flattery – I hope Pamela feels sufficiently flattered today). To solve these mysteries, I’m going to the source.
As a bit of background, poor Tavish recently had eight teeth extracted (more on that later), so he’s on a chewing hiatus until the vet gives him the all-clear. That means no toys… and in Tavish’s view, no fun. Our pals at Pooch Smooches noted that it’s too bad he can’t read. I agree – if he could settle down with a good book, it would make all of our lives easier. Perhaps Pamela can add that one to her list of dog training books.
While we’re at it, let’s teach Tavish and Bella to write too. Then they could explain their motivations to me in witty prose.
Without further ado, here are 7 books I wish my dogs would write:
- Storm Anxiety: Why Peeing on the Dining Room Table Makes Sense
- Somebody’s Watching Me: Threatening Reflections and You
- The House at Toy Corner: Obsessive Canine Disorder
- Noise Anxiety: Why Peeing on the Bed Makes Sense
- Fecal Feng Shui: Yes, the Base of the Patio Stairs is the Perfect Place
- Reflections on Reflux: Throwing Up on the Carpet Instead of the Tile
- Raindrops Won’t Keep Falling on my Head: A Prissy Dog’s Guide to Life
So, those are the books I’d like Bella and Tavish to start penning. It would be kind of nice to understand the motivation behind some of their more puzzling behaviors. Although there are plenty of theories out there, I’d love to hear it straight from the canine’s mouth.
If you could ask your dog (or cat) to write a book explaining why she does what she does, what would the title be?
And now, enjoy some Monday Mischief!
loved this!
Dakota’s book would be “To Bark, Or Not To Bark, That is the Question!!” (and he would choose to BARK!!!!
Or….”Dogs Are From Mars, Cats Are From Venus” 🙂
caren gittleman recently posted..Mish-Mash Monday-A little housekeeping: where we stand on book and product reviews
Haha… I like those!
Great post, lets get those dogs writing. Roxy would write, Dog language-Why I try to talk like a person.
Torrey would say, Routine- Why it’s so imprtant.
Roxy the traveling dog recently posted..Monday Mischief-Dogs of the campground
Good ones!
My babies jump in the tub when there’s thunder or fireworks. I want my dogs to tell me why they find chicken and duck poop so appealing. Ew. You’ll keep us updated on that whole shedding thing, won’t you?
Bella got herself stuck in the bathtub once too – that’s when I learned to close all of the bathroom doors when there’s a storm coming! I was afraid she’d hurt herself hopping in or out.
Hi Y’all!
Just hoppin’ by to say “hi”.
Humans have been busy doing and going. If you saw me in today’s post, you’ll know if they aren’t around, I’m NOT doing…so I’ve really been missin’ y’all!
I’m BOL…peeing under the dining room table makes sense…good one!
Y’all come by now,
Hawk aka BrownDog
Hawk aka BrownDog recently posted..No Mischief Monday
If only it were under, and not on… 😉
That made me laugh out loud. Did a dog really pee ON the dining room table?
Delilah’s would be Lessons In Recall : Why You Should Follow Your Human Everywhere Inside The House But Never While Outside.
Sampson’s would be Cuteness: It Gets You Anything You Want.
Jodi recently posted..Here Has Many Meanings
Oh, Jodi… I wish the answer was no. However, Bella did in fact pull off that feat once.
That Lessons in Recall one sounds about right!
I loved this post.
I would like to read “The Irresistible Lure of Smelly Stuff Washed up on a Beach.”
Jan recently posted..The saga of Missy, a perilous rescue, and a custody battle
Definitely a best seller. 🙂
Road Kill , A Fatal Attraction, would be my book. Have a great Monday.
Best wishes Molly
Molly The Wally recently posted..Blog From The Dog House, Paws For Thought!
Nice one!
After the weekend I just had this is the book Shiva needs to write:
Why Running Around Outside the Agility Ring is More Fun Than Inside
Too wordy? How about:
List of Treats Better Than Garbage
Kristine recently posted..Baffled by Behaviour, Again and Again
PS. I hope Tavish recovers soon! That’s a lot of days with no fun for a puppy.
Kristine recently posted..Baffled by Behaviour, Again and Again
He’s now officially cleared for toy action! 🙂
Lol! 5 and 6 strike particularly close to home! In the Fecal Feng Shui book would also have to include a chapter about walking while pooping so it makes a long, spread-out trail that is even more of a hassle for the human to pick up!
Stacy and Ellie recently posted..Catching Up, Enjoying Summer
Yes! That chapter will definitely have to be included – honestly, maybe it’s a whole new volume.
That’s a great list of books. Lets see if Stetson could write a book it would be Why I Love to Sniff! and Linus would write a book called The Scary Noises Coming from the Refrigerator.
Colby recently posted..Why Getting A Second Dog Is A Good Idea
Hehe… the refrigerator one would totally need a chapter on the terror that is the icemaker.
Haha – I like #2 – that’s perfect for Blueberry. I actually had to turn a full length mirror around so she could go to sleep at night!
How about – “Why I Simply Have to Taste Pee-mail”
“Roll-over Accidents: When a “down” command turns into a belly-rub demand”
Blueberry’s human recently posted..Worth the 100 mile drive
Aw, poor Blueberry!
These are hysterical! OMD, peeing *on* the dining room table. That’s a new one. (And thanks for the shout-out for the blog.) 🙂
Rita would probably write “Who Moved My Cheese?” Subtitled, “Seriously, Will Work for Cheese.”
But I’d really like her to write her autobiography called, “Growing Up On a Beach in Mexico: Or Why Anyone Carrying Anything Stick-like Must be Barked At”. (Wordy… we’ll work on it…)
Jackie Bouchard recently posted..Monday Mischief: UnbreakOBall & Monkeybutts
Oh yeah… Bella’s an original. 😉
I like your titles… especially the cheese one!
I want to see my dog write. Why the UPS man is so fun to bark at.
Oooh, that’s a good topic too. I’d also suggest a second volume: “If I Can See It, It’s Mine: Barking at People Down the Block”
Have a terrific Tuesday.
Best wishes Molly.
Awesome. I’m not only flattered. I’m humbled by the wealth of creativity here.
I am, however, a little worried about the obsession with bodily functions in your list of books. I’m thinking the dogs need to write the following for you–Free Yourself from Worry: Sometimes Sh*t is Just Sh*t. 🙂
Glad to hear Tavish has the all clear to play with toys again. I know the recovery must have been tough on all of you. I hope he feels much better after his dental work.
Pamela recently posted..10 Top Dog Training Tips You Can Use Every Day
LOL. My husband would probably agree that I need to read that book.
He seems to be right back to his happy, bouncy self. 🙂
Let us know if you figure out the one about not shedding! Our mom hates to vacuum but she has to do it everyday cause we shed lots of hair! Mom wants to know why our Shiloh always insisted on eating the toilet paper? That has always puzzled our mom? Toilet paper, yuck!
Dogs N Pawz recently posted..Goodbye Sweet Shiloh
I am so with you… although, I SHOULD vacuum every day, I have to admit I don’t. LOL