Trend report: What’s the hottest new clothing brand for dogs?

It’s probably an April Fool’s joke, but I’d totally shop at a store called American Beagle Outfitters. I make it a personal goal to patronize pun-loving establishments.

While we’re at it, I demand punny versions of other clothing stores. Coming soon to a mall near you (if I get my way):

  • Labercrombie & Bitch
  • Barneys Mew York
  • Sheddie Bower
  • Groomingdale’s
  • J. Mew
  • Johnston and Purrphy
  • Neiman Barkus

Are you listening, American Eagle? I have a feeling that American Beagle Outfitters would actually turn out to be pretty profitable. Have you realized how many crazy dog people are out there? (Present company included, of course.)

someecards.com - Having a pet is the reason I only spend 97% of the day thinking about myself.

via someecards.com

Get on it, AE… blaze that trail and usher in a new era of punny pet apparel stores.

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It’s time to spring fur-ward!

It’s time for another link roundup…

  1. First up, your punny pet name for the week: Lickey Mantle. (Bonus Pisces pun!)
  2. I know it’s an unpopular opinion, but I just adore when the clocks spring forward. I’ve been doing my own Care Bear Countdown, waiting for those extra hours of evening daylight to appear.

    someecards.com - The hour we lose this weekend was the one when I was planning to go to the gym.

    via someecards.com

  3. Seriously, if I wasn’t so lazy, I’d be celebrating like these party animals right now. (If I’m being honest, I’m super jealous of this crew.)
  4. Daylight Saving Time also means that spring is on its way. After this never-ending winter, I’m ready for some warmth… and perhaps a glass of wine or two. Or maybe a picnic?
  5. I’m not picky. I’ll happily accept a beer instead, especially if baseball is involved.
  6. Wineries, ballparks, dance studios… puppies are everywhere these days!

Finally, for today’s video, I present a dramatic reenactment of how happy I will be when winter is officially over:

True story.

Oh, and in case you missed it, here’s what we’ve been up to on the blog lately:

I know they’re usually Friday links, but I’m off my schedule lately. I figure you don’t mind too much.

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In which I want to buy all the things…

This past weekend, I attended the Super Pet Expo in northern Virginia. I actually ended up going twice. On Friday, I went with a few friends to do some shopping. Then on Sunday, I volunteered at the Friends of Homeless Animals (FOHA) dog booth.

I’m full of post ideas after this weekend. Today, I thought I’d start by sharing the damage the expo did to my pocketbook. I managed not to buy all the things, but I did buy a few. Prepare for an onslaught of photos…

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Seuss-obsessed blogger on the loose (plus… cats in hats!)

February has passed, and March has slid into its place. The first signs of spring are slowly showing their face. Today is the first day of this glorious time, but do you know why tomorrow has inspired me to rhyme?

If you’re a studious scholar of literary renown, it’s likely this riddle will not cause you to frown. It just so happens that many years ago on that day, a man named Theodor Geisel joined our great mortal play. That’s right – tomorrow’s the birthday of the fab Dr. Seuss, so now you know that my rhyming has a fantastic excuse. I became similarly rhythmic at the same time last year, so I hope that this format will not cause you to jeer.

  1. First up, I present you with a new punny pet name. Last year, Fleaodor Seuss Geisel was my entry of fame. Repeating myself would be cheating a tad, so instead I introduce you to Ms. Feral Ladd.
  2. Fun flights of fancy seem quite fitting today, so enjoy these whimsical paintings without further delay.
  3. Do you find the alphabet much, much too tame? Use the Seussabet instead – you’ll not again feel the same.
  4. Dr. Seuss is remembered for the Grinch, green ham, and a cat, but his body of work is far more extensive than that. Before all the Sneetches or an elephant caper, Seuss was in the same business as one Mr. Don Draper.
  5. Speaking of hats, it seems the good doctor had quite a flair, for finding charming haberdashery to cover his hair.
  6. I think that this story is worth sharing, so go take a quick look. I wish that someone named Martha Graham Cracker was here to read me a book.
  7. Here’s the answer to a question you likely did not ponder: it’s Star Wars redone in shades of Seussian wonder.
  8. Although the Lorax is often quite busy speaking for trees, he still inspires fantastical parties with the greatest of ease. (Yet if you may permit me one quibble with that adorable scheme, the use of all that paper might somewhat contradict the book’s theme? I’m probably being a picky old grouch, but if I’d kept my mouth shut, I’d have felt like a slouch. In my mind, I’ll just hope that this use was excusable, and that these cute decorations will prove to be quite reusable.)
  9. This story is old, but some might find it surprising. Who knew that Yertle the Turtle posed the danger of a grade school uprising?
  10. If you’re not anti-Yertle and hosting a Seussian soiree, put these dishes on your menu to simply blow guests away.
  11. We’re not the only blog paying tribute to this brilliant writer. This poem from Cat Chat is another one to help make your day brighter.
  12. Oh, and in case a product rep is here doing some reading, I have some advice that might help if you think of proceeding. Before you request a humble blogger work for free, I suggest you take a moment – or perhaps even three - to read this cautionary missive that will help in gauging, just why your unsolicited email could prove to be mildly enraging.

Now it’s time to abandon the numerical form. I end with a video (as is often the norm):

How will you celebrate this prince of the book? Perhaps channeling his characters with your next fashionable look?

If I can make one final request of you at this time… if you’re going to comment, maybe do it in rhyme? Rhyming comments would fill me with utter delight. Then I’ll know that this post did not lead to mass reader flight.

(I hope that this format did make you feel glee, but regardless, dear reader, the choice was not up to me. For you see, I’m not only a great Seussian fan, I happen to share the day of my birth with the man. Now that my motives have been fully explained, I’m sure you’ll agree that my whimsy was no doubt preordained.)

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Grab your puppy purse & meet me on the red carpet

As you know, I am addicted to awards shows. The Academy Awards are this weekend, which makes me feel… well, kind of like this.

(Oh, and if you follow me on Twitter, I apologize in advance for the fact that I will probably tweet far too much about the Oscars on Sunday evening.)

  1. Your punny pet names are, of course, inspired by this year’s nominees: Spaniel Day-Lewis, Alan Barkin, and Fang Lee. 
  2. I wish I was throwing an Oscar party so that I could make these punny foods. I’m especially partial to Beets of the Southern Wild.
  3. Has there ever been a puppy purse on the red carpet at the Academy Awards? Well, there will be soon. To paraphrase Ted Mosby… Pulling. It. Off.
  4. I would very much like to hire these animal doppelgängers to star in punny remakes of my favorite Oscar movies. (Until then, this video will have to do.)
  5. If that random Tupac hologram isn’t available, maybe the Academy should consider asking Tupac Shacorgi to be a presenter instead. Ratings gold.
  6. I enjoy this slightly different take on the Best Picture race.
  7. Speaking of Best Picture winners, these posters are pretty cool.
  8. Still need to fill out your Oscar ballot? Here’s one way to make your picks.

I was torn between two videos this week, both starring the canine star of a past Best Picture winner: Uggie from The Artist! Although this one features Uggie in a tie, the corny humor in the video below edged it out by the slimmest of margins.

Finally, in conclusion… thanks, Meryl.

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Moonwalking down memory lane…

I’m feeling nostalgic today (and every day, but let’s set that problem aside for now). Maybe this weekend I’ll bust out my jelly shoes and play with my Brenda Walsh paper doll.

Oh, wait. I own neither of those things. Tragic.

  1. First up, your punny pet name: Henona Ryder (or Winona Flyder).
  2. On a pun-related note, these reworked movie posters are killing me. Seriously, how did I never come up with Abraham Lynxin?
  3. Continuing on the poster theme, these minimalist posters of children’s classics are pretty neat.
  4. Seriously though, I’m beginning to question my pun-slinging skills. I also wish that I had come up with Ernest Lemingway.
  5. Given that I mentioned both Winona and good ol’ Brenda Walsh above, do you love the movie Heathers? If not, might I ask… what is your damage?
  6. Speaking of damage, this article about Jem and the Holograms may have broken my brain.
  7. Now I’m going to be singing this all day.

You know, this cat can moonwalk better than I ever could:

Thanks for joining me on this (moon)walk down memory lane!

(Don’t forget – the #SuperDogPics Twitter party is this Sunday. Have you RSVP’d?)

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