… or, in this case, your Bella.

I was thinking recently about all of the things – both little and not-so-little – that have changed around here since we lost Bella in May. Sometimes it seems like I’m surrounded by a thousand tiny reminders on any given day.

Loosely inspired by this song, here are twenty (out of countless) ways I miss my Bella:

1. Every morning, I wake up to the sight of an empty dog bed. I can’t quite bring myself to move it.
2. I haven’t moved her food dish either.
3. My morning routine has changed. I’d gotten used to spending at least thirty minutes cajoling Bella into eating her breakfast.
4. There’s no one in the blanket cave that Bella liked to hide in.
5. In fact, I washed the blanket in question and put it in the linen closet.
6. The nights are different too. It’s quiet without her nightly cave to bed migration.
7. I miss her snoring. It was loud, yet so comforting.
8. It’s weird to walk by the front door and not see her watching the world go by.
9. Tavish has been spending less time staring through those windows as well.
10. Every time I vacuum, I feel a little sad. With each pass, I’m removing more Bella hair that will never be replenished.
11. For that reason, I didn’t even try to vacuum for the first month.
12. When I finally did vacuum, I couldn’t stop thinking about the time(s) Bella left a toy in front of the vacuum as her own form of protest. We (perhaps inappropriately) called it her Tiananmen Square move.
13. My stairs are curiously clear of furry obstacles.
14. I miss helping Bella go up and down the stairs.
15. My kitchen seems empty too. I keep avoiding Bellas that are no longer camped out waiting for food to fall from the sky.
16. I’m falling out of practice with regard to all of those hand signals.
17. Tavish seems to spend a lot more time licking the humans in the house.
18. Sometimes I wonder if that’s because his usual kissing target isn’t available now.
19. Working in the yard is weird too. She always loved to supervise (aka nap in the flower beds) while we puttered around.
20. I really, really, really miss my Bella hugs.

How I miss that sweet and silly face…